Wednesday, December 29, 2004
How to Survive the Looming War of Armageddon
A co-worker told me that the Asian tsunami is the beginning of the end-times. Like in the days of Noah, God used a great deluge to punish the wicked (because we all know that the most wicked in this world are the impoverished residents of coastal Third World villages, followed closely by those who vacation in Thailand). Also, the earthquake apparently shook Earth ever so slightly off its axis, and now the planet is spinning a little bit faster than before. This is one of the Biblical signs of the impending Apocalypse, she says. She also says that we're all so wrapped up in our own business that most of us haven't even recognized this sign for what it is. Her case is very convincing, I think. I have to wonder, though, why does God like Jet Li and Helmut Kohl so? Is it because they're so rich and handsome and ethnic? Or because they can both kill a man with one foot?
A co-worker told me that the Asian tsunami is the beginning of the end-times. Like in the days of Noah, God used a great deluge to punish the wicked (because we all know that the most wicked in this world are the impoverished residents of coastal Third World villages, followed closely by those who vacation in Thailand). Also, the earthquake apparently shook Earth ever so slightly off its axis, and now the planet is spinning a little bit faster than before. This is one of the Biblical signs of the impending Apocalypse, she says. She also says that we're all so wrapped up in our own business that most of us haven't even recognized this sign for what it is. Her case is very convincing, I think. I have to wonder, though, why does God like Jet Li and Helmut Kohl so? Is it because they're so rich and handsome and ethnic? Or because they can both kill a man with one foot?
