Sunday, September 12, 2004
Where The Red Lady Live At?
The puddle of sweat collecting at my feet grows larger by the second. At this point nerves are shot. Gone I tell you. The shakes have taken over as my mind races. The one in the center or the one on the left? Dudes, I may really be fucked this time.
"Negro, lay it down. You ain't picking until you lay down the cash."
Confusion. You see, I'm white and while the South Florida sun has blessed my skin with an unseasonal bronzing, I'm still as blanco as they come. I have no idea why this flim flam man would want call me that.
"It's easy my brother, just put the 400 dollars in my hand and tell me where the red lady live at."
A shrill voice, belonging to the thick young lady standing by my side calls out, "the one on the left! It's the one on the left! I was watchin'! I was watchin' good!"
"The Left", I nervously say, while white-knuckling my wad of cash.
"Lay down the money," orders the flim flam man.
"The one on the left"
"Look, I ain't turning nothing over til your money's on this street."
Going against everything I've ever known, I put my cash on the curb. "The one on the left."
The flim flam man reaches toward a row of three playing cards, each with a lengthwise crease, laying facedown on the sidewalk. He quickly flips over the one on the left. It's a 2 of clubs. My heart sinks, and I turn to walk away.
"Hold on a second negro. You want to check out the other two? Make sure I ain't fucking with ya?"
"I guess."
He flips the other two cards. The queen of hearts was in the middle.
"Pssssshht. I told you to pick the one in the middle, mother fucker," my thick friend cries.
Dejected and much poorer, I sulk away, passing the flim flam man's burly enforcer friend.
"Now that's what I call an easy 400 dollars. Easy as mutha fuckin' apple pie."
Three Card Monte is not for the thin skinned or the thin walleted.
The puddle of sweat collecting at my feet grows larger by the second. At this point nerves are shot. Gone I tell you. The shakes have taken over as my mind races. The one in the center or the one on the left? Dudes, I may really be fucked this time.
"Negro, lay it down. You ain't picking until you lay down the cash."
Confusion. You see, I'm white and while the South Florida sun has blessed my skin with an unseasonal bronzing, I'm still as blanco as they come. I have no idea why this flim flam man would want call me that.
"It's easy my brother, just put the 400 dollars in my hand and tell me where the red lady live at."
A shrill voice, belonging to the thick young lady standing by my side calls out, "the one on the left! It's the one on the left! I was watchin'! I was watchin' good!"
"The Left", I nervously say, while white-knuckling my wad of cash.
"Lay down the money," orders the flim flam man.
"The one on the left"
"Look, I ain't turning nothing over til your money's on this street."
Going against everything I've ever known, I put my cash on the curb. "The one on the left."
The flim flam man reaches toward a row of three playing cards, each with a lengthwise crease, laying facedown on the sidewalk. He quickly flips over the one on the left. It's a 2 of clubs. My heart sinks, and I turn to walk away.
"Hold on a second negro. You want to check out the other two? Make sure I ain't fucking with ya?"
"I guess."
He flips the other two cards. The queen of hearts was in the middle.
"Pssssshht. I told you to pick the one in the middle, mother fucker," my thick friend cries.
Dejected and much poorer, I sulk away, passing the flim flam man's burly enforcer friend.
"Now that's what I call an easy 400 dollars. Easy as mutha fuckin' apple pie."
Three Card Monte is not for the thin skinned or the thin walleted.
