Wednesday, May 19, 2004
I did that chocolate thing - it was good.
Yes, we only partially exist, but that is for we are illimitably powerful men, with precious few spare seconds to waste upon this computer boondoggle. Who has time to write bullshit about nonsense on the Intraweb when there are Netflixes to be encountered? This past weekend we saw much, and learned far more, and with each successive occasion the truths of the moment and our collective sacred past offered themselves up like bosoms to the suckling babe.
Raiders of the Lost Ark is as marvelous as ever, effulgent with wit and verve lacking in most subsequent summer blockbusters. It even puts Star Wars to shame in terms of pure visceral excitement. It’s almost as good as The Scorpion King. I can’t wait to see the next one, Indiana Jones and the Commute from Hell. HAHAHAHAHA!. Stuck on You is easily the Farrelly brothers’ most likable film. It may not be their funniest movie, but it is relatively well acted, and who doesn’t love Matt Damon? He is lovable, and loved. And Cher! She is as brilliant as the Sun devouring Albert Einstein and Leonardo Da Vinci’s baby. She should be given a million billion Academy Awards, an Oscar for every transcendent utterance of each unassuming syllable, and a gallon of Golden Globes for each seductive motion. And Eva Mendes’s surgeon should get a fucking Nobel Prize. But it’s an amusing little trifle, with some laughs and some tears, and one ineffably great scene featuring ex-pat Patriot Lawyer Milloy and everybody’s favorite North Quincy resident Tom Brady. We also watched Thirteen, an amazing comedy starring Holly Hunter and that girl from that show nobody watched. I really like these mockumentaries that are so popular these days, and this one might just be the best. This irreverent girl keeps on getting all mixed up in wacky scrapes and mishaps, and she just can’t stay out of trouble. Her follies and foibles are just like real life, but with a little twist. Hunter plays the girl’s exasperated but loving mom, and some of her reaction shots are pure comedic gold. I mean, what can you do with a daughter like this, except shrug your shoulders, shake your head, and laugh? Some of the girl’s hilarious schemes reminded me of myself when I was thirteen, and I’m sure this will be true for most of you. We’re all thirteen once, if you live to be that old, and being thirteen means acting a little bit nutty. Keep your eyes pealed for Atlanta native Kip Pardue’s brief cameo – his hilarious antics nearly steal the show. The bravery it took for Jon Lovitz to portray the sweet mentally handicapped drug baron trying to recover that important microchip that was mistakenly slipped into the girl’s purse is astoundingly inspiring. But so Thirteen is as funny as Requiem for a Dream, but without all that anachronistic slapstick. And it’s sure to leave you feeling so good.
I can’t wait to see who wins America’s Idol. Hopefully my “dog” Matt Rogers will pull off the big upset. That guy totally played in some football game! He’s the greatest generation.
Yes, we only partially exist, but that is for we are illimitably powerful men, with precious few spare seconds to waste upon this computer boondoggle. Who has time to write bullshit about nonsense on the Intraweb when there are Netflixes to be encountered? This past weekend we saw much, and learned far more, and with each successive occasion the truths of the moment and our collective sacred past offered themselves up like bosoms to the suckling babe.
Raiders of the Lost Ark is as marvelous as ever, effulgent with wit and verve lacking in most subsequent summer blockbusters. It even puts Star Wars to shame in terms of pure visceral excitement. It’s almost as good as The Scorpion King. I can’t wait to see the next one, Indiana Jones and the Commute from Hell. HAHAHAHAHA!. Stuck on You is easily the Farrelly brothers’ most likable film. It may not be their funniest movie, but it is relatively well acted, and who doesn’t love Matt Damon? He is lovable, and loved. And Cher! She is as brilliant as the Sun devouring Albert Einstein and Leonardo Da Vinci’s baby. She should be given a million billion Academy Awards, an Oscar for every transcendent utterance of each unassuming syllable, and a gallon of Golden Globes for each seductive motion. And Eva Mendes’s surgeon should get a fucking Nobel Prize. But it’s an amusing little trifle, with some laughs and some tears, and one ineffably great scene featuring ex-pat Patriot Lawyer Milloy and everybody’s favorite North Quincy resident Tom Brady. We also watched Thirteen, an amazing comedy starring Holly Hunter and that girl from that show nobody watched. I really like these mockumentaries that are so popular these days, and this one might just be the best. This irreverent girl keeps on getting all mixed up in wacky scrapes and mishaps, and she just can’t stay out of trouble. Her follies and foibles are just like real life, but with a little twist. Hunter plays the girl’s exasperated but loving mom, and some of her reaction shots are pure comedic gold. I mean, what can you do with a daughter like this, except shrug your shoulders, shake your head, and laugh? Some of the girl’s hilarious schemes reminded me of myself when I was thirteen, and I’m sure this will be true for most of you. We’re all thirteen once, if you live to be that old, and being thirteen means acting a little bit nutty. Keep your eyes pealed for Atlanta native Kip Pardue’s brief cameo – his hilarious antics nearly steal the show. The bravery it took for Jon Lovitz to portray the sweet mentally handicapped drug baron trying to recover that important microchip that was mistakenly slipped into the girl’s purse is astoundingly inspiring. But so Thirteen is as funny as Requiem for a Dream, but without all that anachronistic slapstick. And it’s sure to leave you feeling so good.
I can’t wait to see who wins America’s Idol. Hopefully my “dog” Matt Rogers will pull off the big upset. That guy totally played in some football game! He’s the greatest generation.
