Thursday, August 23, 2007
i needs bof of my muthafuckin body parts
This is completely stolen from Everyday Should Be Saturday. University of Michigan football player Marques "Grand Marques" Slocum answered some poll thing on his Facebook account, and wound up writing the funniest shit since I Am Charlotte Simmons. Here you go.
This is completely stolen from Everyday Should Be Saturday. University of Michigan football player Marques "Grand Marques" Slocum answered some poll thing on his Facebook account, and wound up writing the funniest shit since I Am Charlotte Simmons. Here you go.
What is your favorite song of all time?
Just another nigga- state property II
Do you own any pets, and if so what do you have?
i got a fuck lion now come fuck wit me
Who do you admire most?
My mom CARLA, dat bitch da shit, i love her i think she da realest bitch alive
Do you have any tattoos, and if so what and where?
fuckin real
When do you plan on getting married?
it dont matta cuz i hope my wife know ima be playa 4 life
Get the number or give the number?
i would have 2 say bof
Romance or Kinky Sex?
it dont matta however i can get it
How do you feel?
i feel like killin somebody so dont be dat person… lol….not really dont be dat person
What size shoe do you wear?
a big enouf size 2 boot chu da fuck up outta here
T-Mobile, U.S. Cellular, Cingular/AT&T, or Sprint/Nextel
sprint/nextel bitch! dey got da best phones
Would you rather be hot or cold?
fuckin warm fuck dat hot shit and dat cold shit Id rather it be in da middle
Would you rather lose an arm or a leg?
what da fuck! i needs bof of my muthafuckin body parts
Opera, Musical, Concert, Play, Performance, or Other?
opera- no, musical- no, concert- maybe. play- no, performance- fuuuuuuuuuuuck no, other- no
What is your favorite clothing brand?
state property, im on my philly shit im on my jawn… lol
Most Memorable Past?
shit i couldnt tell u cuz i dont know
If you had to pick one car, which would it be?
96 impala ss
Your favorite Disney Films?
fuck disney
Why did the chicken cross the road?
cuz he was all fiend out
Do you support Paris?
why should i
Where is Waldo?
i killed dat punk muthafucka he owed me money
Favorite element?
i would have 2 go with………….. water
What was your last thought?
why da fuck am i doin dis interview
Firefox, Internet Explorer, Netscape, or other?
i dont give a fuck i just want 2 get on
Who are you going to vote for in 2008?
me
Juice and crackers or milk and cookies?
i want sum milk and cookies
Favorite fruit?
watermelon
Which is worse? A bad laugh or a bad cough?
dam mafucka u just fucked up da mood, i guess i aint sayin no more jokes
Are you a cat or a dog person?
im fuckin wit a rock or a pit just so it can cha cat
Would you rather be blind or deaf?
deaf btu dam neither
Define yourself in 3 words…
im da shit
Do you eat cold cereal at night?
what da fuck is cold cereal
What is your favorite TV show?
the wire
Kill the spider or let it out?
man! fuck dat spider
Do you shower every single day?
shit i at least get a bird bath but yea i shower everyday dis summer its 2 hot not 2
Walking past a beggar, spare change or ignore?
shit ima be askin him 4 sum change
Boat or bus?
bus bitch! i cant swim
Where do you want to travel next?
da future
What would you do if Michael Jackson asked you out
I be like yea and den ima rob em’, ima steal all his shit and im stealin bubbles and im sellin dat muthafucka
What is your favorite food?
I like 2 licky licky licky licky… lol
Do you read harry potter books?
who da fuck is dat!
If you could have one super human power what would you choose?
come on now i wanna fly i hate walkin dat shit overrated
Have you had a beer in the last week?
shit I downed a forty last night in 2min. and 37sec. yea, beerfest bitch! im ready 4 da boot!
Vitamin Water or Gatorade?
Bof of dem shits is nasty but i fuck wit gatorade
Favorite body part?
my whole fuckin body
Flip flops or sandles?
come on now! what type of question is dat?
What do you do on fridays?
whatever da fuck i feel like doin
Do you like bananas?
do u
Tuesday, August 21, 2007
Friday, August 17, 2007
Wednesday, August 15, 2007
Jose Offerman Assaults Pitcher and Catcher With Bat
BRIDGEPORT, Conn. -- Former major league All-Star Jose Offerman was arrested Tuesday night after charging the mound and hitting the pitcher and catcher with his bat during an independent minor league game.
Bridgeport police said Offerman was arrested, but did not detail the charge. Police said he posted bond.
Offerman, playing for the Long Island Ducks in the Atlantic League, homered in the first inning. The next inning, he was hit by a pitch from Bridgeport's Matt Beech and charged the mound with his bat.
Offerman hit Beech in the hands and struck catcher John Nathans in the head.
The game was delayed for about 20 minutes because of the melee. Offerman, Beech and Bridgeport manager and former major league pitcher Tommy John were all ejected.
There was no immediate update on the condition of Beech or Nathans.
Offerman batted .273 during his 15 seasons in the majors. He last played in the majors in 2005 with Philadelphia and the New York Mets. He was an All-Star in 1995 with the Dodgers and 1999 with Boston.
BRIDGEPORT, Conn. -- Former major league All-Star Jose Offerman was arrested Tuesday night after charging the mound and hitting the pitcher and catcher with his bat during an independent minor league game.
Bridgeport police said Offerman was arrested, but did not detail the charge. Police said he posted bond.
Offerman, playing for the Long Island Ducks in the Atlantic League, homered in the first inning. The next inning, he was hit by a pitch from Bridgeport's Matt Beech and charged the mound with his bat.
Offerman hit Beech in the hands and struck catcher John Nathans in the head.
The game was delayed for about 20 minutes because of the melee. Offerman, Beech and Bridgeport manager and former major league pitcher Tommy John were all ejected.
There was no immediate update on the condition of Beech or Nathans.
Offerman batted .273 during his 15 seasons in the majors. He last played in the majors in 2005 with Philadelphia and the New York Mets. He was an All-Star in 1995 with the Dodgers and 1999 with Boston.
Tuesday, August 14, 2007
links to recent reviews
This place might be kind of dead lately, but I upload reviews over at the Kindercore weblog with some regularity. Here are a few links.
1. review of Rick Spears and Chuck B.B.'s BLACK METAL
2. review of Grant Morrison and JH Williams III's BATMAN #667
3. reviews of various comics released on 8-1-07
This place might be kind of dead lately, but I upload reviews over at the Kindercore weblog with some regularity. Here are a few links.
1. review of Rick Spears and Chuck B.B.'s BLACK METAL
2. review of Grant Morrison and JH Williams III's BATMAN #667
3. reviews of various comics released on 8-1-07
Friday, August 10, 2007
your occasional radio reminder
Mesmerization Eclipse, WZBC 90.3 FM, 3 to 5 pm. Absolutely no idea what I'll be playing yet. This'll be the second week in a row I roll up five minutes before 3 with absolutely no cds on me.
Mesmerization Eclipse, WZBC 90.3 FM, 3 to 5 pm. Absolutely no idea what I'll be playing yet. This'll be the second week in a row I roll up five minutes before 3 with absolutely no cds on me.
Wednesday, August 08, 2007
Tuesday, August 07, 2007
more stuff to read elsewhere
here's the third of my (mostly) weekly comic review columns over at the new Kindercore site.
here's the third of my (mostly) weekly comic review columns over at the new Kindercore site.
Thursday, August 02, 2007
2007 - 2009 Braves = 2002 - 2004 Mets.
2007 - 2009 Braves = 2002 - 2004 Mets.
Good job raping your farm system.
sa | 08.02.07 - 12:31 pm |
Seriously, I was hoping the Braves landed Tex for two reasons:
One, because trades like this is the exact opposite reason the Braves won 70 million division titles in a row. Their incredible farm system constantly supporting and augmenting the major league squad is what made them so consistently good. Trading FOUR of your very best prospects for a declining player (Tex is not as awesome as he used to be, and he's moving from a hitter's paradise to the NL) is exactly something out of the Steve Phillips guidebook.
Two, before the trade deadline I wasn't worried about the Braves. The Mets were injured and underachieving and still in first place. Now, this is gonna get exciting. Bring it on.
2007 - 2009 Braves = 2002 - 2004 Mets.
Good job raping your farm system.
sa | 08.02.07 - 12:31 pm |
Seriously, I was hoping the Braves landed Tex for two reasons:
One, because trades like this is the exact opposite reason the Braves won 70 million division titles in a row. Their incredible farm system constantly supporting and augmenting the major league squad is what made them so consistently good. Trading FOUR of your very best prospects for a declining player (Tex is not as awesome as he used to be, and he's moving from a hitter's paradise to the NL) is exactly something out of the Steve Phillips guidebook.
Two, before the trade deadline I wasn't worried about the Braves. The Mets were injured and underachieving and still in first place. Now, this is gonna get exciting. Bring it on.
Wednesday, August 01, 2007
Dock Ellis tidbits from various internets
One of the things on Dock's resume is attempting to hit every batter in the Cincinnati Reds lineup on May 1, 1974. He felt his teammates had lost their aggressiveness and were too easily intimidated. He announced before the game that "We gonna get down. We gonna do the do. I'm going to hit these motherfuckers." In an effort to prove a point to teammates, Ellis hit Pete Rose, Joe Morgan, and Dan Driessen in the top of the first. The clean-up batter Tony Perez avoided Ellis' attempts, instead drawing a walk, and after two pitches aimed at the head of Johnny Bench, Ellis was removed from the game by manager Danny Murtaugh. Ellis' box score for the game reads: 0 IP, 0 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 1 BB, 0 K.
Of course, the big one is when he pitched a no-hitter on acid on June 12th, 1970. Ellis spent the morning relaxing in his hometown of Los Angeles, under the mistaken belief that it was an off day. Ellis dropped the acid at noon and an hour later his girlfriend noticed in the newspaper he had to pitch a game against the Dodgers that night in San Diego. Ellis boarded a shuttle flight to the ballpark, took some amphetamines to mitigate the effects of the acid, and then threw a no-hitter despite not being able to feel the ball or clearly see the batter or catcher. According to Ellis, catcher Jerry May wore reflective tape on his fingers, which helped Ellis to see his target.
"I can only remember bits and pieces of the game. I was psyched. I had a feeling of euphoria.
I was zeroed in on the [cather's] glove, but I didn't hit the glove too much. I remember hitting a couple of batters and the bases were loaded two or three times.
The ball was small sometimes, the ball was large sometimes, sometimes I saw the catcher, sometimes I didn't. Sometimes I tried to stare the hitter down and throw while I was looking at him. I chewed my gum until it turned to powder. They say I had about three to four fielding chances. I remember diving out of the way of a ball I thought was a line drive. I jumped, but the ball wasn't hit hard and never reached me."
One of the things on Dock's resume is attempting to hit every batter in the Cincinnati Reds lineup on May 1, 1974. He felt his teammates had lost their aggressiveness and were too easily intimidated. He announced before the game that "We gonna get down. We gonna do the do. I'm going to hit these motherfuckers." In an effort to prove a point to teammates, Ellis hit Pete Rose, Joe Morgan, and Dan Driessen in the top of the first. The clean-up batter Tony Perez avoided Ellis' attempts, instead drawing a walk, and after two pitches aimed at the head of Johnny Bench, Ellis was removed from the game by manager Danny Murtaugh. Ellis' box score for the game reads: 0 IP, 0 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 1 BB, 0 K.
Of course, the big one is when he pitched a no-hitter on acid on June 12th, 1970. Ellis spent the morning relaxing in his hometown of Los Angeles, under the mistaken belief that it was an off day. Ellis dropped the acid at noon and an hour later his girlfriend noticed in the newspaper he had to pitch a game against the Dodgers that night in San Diego. Ellis boarded a shuttle flight to the ballpark, took some amphetamines to mitigate the effects of the acid, and then threw a no-hitter despite not being able to feel the ball or clearly see the batter or catcher. According to Ellis, catcher Jerry May wore reflective tape on his fingers, which helped Ellis to see his target.
"I can only remember bits and pieces of the game. I was psyched. I had a feeling of euphoria.
I was zeroed in on the [cather's] glove, but I didn't hit the glove too much. I remember hitting a couple of batters and the bases were loaded two or three times.
The ball was small sometimes, the ball was large sometimes, sometimes I saw the catcher, sometimes I didn't. Sometimes I tried to stare the hitter down and throw while I was looking at him. I chewed my gum until it turned to powder. They say I had about three to four fielding chances. I remember diving out of the way of a ball I thought was a line drive. I jumped, but the ball wasn't hit hard and never reached me."
